With Apologies to Dr. Suess

The sun sure did shine.
It was too hot to write.
I just couldn't get witty,
Try as I might.

I sat there with Pippin.
We sat there, we two.
And I said, "How I wish
We had something to do!"

Too humid for afghans,
Too hot to knit wool.
So we sat in the house
And I picked up a stole.


So all I could do was
Knit!
Knit!
Knit!
Knit!
With silk and with cotton
On socks or a mitt.

Something that floated,
Something that flapped,
Something that didn't
Heat up my lap.

I shut down the laptop
And took up my "Lil."
I knit a few rounds,
And that fit the bill.
Thing one and Thing two
Were nowhere in sight.
But my bad little monkey?
He put up a fight.

He went to the kitchen.
Crept over the floor.
And then my bad monkey?
He opened the door.

To the fridge. And he worked
His way to the top,
With a jump, and a wiggle,
And an odd little hop.

So there he sat,
Sweet as you please.
Atop the butter,
Alongside the cheese.



And did I remove him?
Not one little bit.
The day was too hot
For a monk's hissy fit.

I went to the thermostat.
(Made sure it was on.)
Then sat in my chair
And stifled a yawn.




Took up my knitting,
And, shaking my head,
Left my bad monkey
And picked up Big Red
It was too hot for wool,
Too hot for words.
Too hot for anything.
Least that's what I heard.

So I sat there and knit,
All that long, long, hot day.
Cause the heat was too much.
I had nothing to say.
Not that today
is going to be fine.
It's 80 degrees
and it's just half past nine.

So, if write I must
And be snarky too,
I'll have to be clever.
Know just what to do.

I won't worry my brain
Till my fillings come loose.
Instead I'll just steal borrow
From dear Dr. Suess




PS. The only word I could come up with to rhyme with scarf, is barf.

Heat must have fried the brain cells.

Random (but technologically productive)Thursday

Was going to post a "think" piece today, but have found that after learning how to navigate Wordpress, Flickr, and Yahoo, I am out of time...

But I have still had a productive morning day. I:

Posted for the first time at the Inspired by Nature KAL (Go Lil!)
Posted for first time at Sock a Month KAL (Bad monkey!)
Set up a secret email account on Yahoo for AJ's Secret Sock Swap (Go me?)
Updated my photo set for Lil's badge (see right)
Read all about everybody's holiday festivities

Meanwhile, back in Lilyland, have finished the center motif, completed the transition to the next darker dye lot of melon seasilk and have begun the feather and fan pattern (barely.)









Progress on Lil has slowed considerably, since her girth is growing. Current speed: 4rph (rows per hour)









Of course I could go faster, IF THE FRIGGIN' CORRECTION SHEET WAS (oh, I don't know) CORRECT?

Yesterday's outrage: (and it's hard to believe) the correction sheet directions were wrong and the original as printed in the book were right.

Imagine that.

*****************

When you can't find your mouse anymore...









it must be time to find the cat









clean up your workspace. (That's Jingle, our elderly grand dame. She's shyer than Pippin. Take a bow, ol' girl!)

I did reorganize my knitting basket. Put all the KAL projects in the top basket (those with deadlines take priority, right?) That means lots of second sock yarn. ( I figure if I complete the pair in July, it counts. Right?)









Pippin wants to know who put all the lumps in the mattress.

It's a Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood...

Welcome back to Lilyland, where the fun never stops!

Here's a progress shot. See how Lily is just lying there?

You think it's because I whipped her into submission?

OH NO, my friends, our gal Lil is a DEMANDING MISTRESS!
(She's lying down because she spent all day torturing me and it wore her out - the poor thing...)

Today's torture device?

See that little arrow with the one next to it? That means you shift the entire piece from that point on FOR THE REST OF THE FRIGGIN SHAWL (give me a minute here while I compose myself. )

(Deep breath) one stitch to the right.


Lucky for me I had my super duper XRX-ray glasses on after yesterday's fiasco. First place I looked when things stopped lining up, was at the chart, and there, nearly hidden by my color change notes (in red) was the offending instruction.

HAH!

DOUBLE HAH!!

TRIPLE HAH!!!


Foiled again, thou evil queen, by the ever present power of:

SUPER-KNITTER (with a little help from her friends.)



Would you like to take a closer look at Lil? (sort of like sticking your hand into the tarantula cage, isn't it?)










Hey! Don't get too close.

She bites (big time)











Back away from the shawl, and no one will get hurt...

****************************************************

On a happier note, I have an FO to show you. Nothing terribly special, another chevron scarf (yawn!) I call it Tom's Chevy, because I finished it up over the weekend while watching Forrest Gump on Friday night, Castaway on Saturday night, and The Green Mile on Sunday afternoon. It was a Tom Hanks jamboree!


Pattern: Chevron Scarf from Last Minute Knitted Gifts
Yarn: Blue Moon Seduction (merino & tencel) in Farmhouse and Watermelon Tourmaline
Modifications: none (told you it was boring!)



I went with the Seduction because it has more drape and a softer hand than STR. Besides, who wouldn't want to hang a little seduction around their neck now and then?


And while we're showing pictures...









I call it the Pepto Bismol Yarn

Adrienne Vittadini Miranda - worsted weight woven cotton in watermelon

Got it on close out at Handworks Gallery, some time ago. Was going to make the cover sweater from Adrienne Vittadini's spring/summer 2007 book.










Didn't want day-glo orange. (also didn't want to spend over $200 for it!)

So instead I got non-refundable Pepto Bismol yarn (Yay me!)










Lots & lots of Pepto Bismol yarn (Did I mention it's non-refundable?)

OY!!

Welcome to Lilyland!

Isn't she lovely?
Isn't she wonderful?
Isn't she precious?
Less than one minute old!
I never thought through love we'd be
Making one as lovely as she.
But isn't she lovely, made from love?

- Stevie Wonder

Welcome to Lilyland, boys and girls, where the yarn is yummy, the knitting is lovely, and the artist formerly known as Susan is losing her mind.

Here we see our first exhibit:
Melon Seasilk #1
(pretty isn't she?)



Our next stop demonstrates what happens when you take slippery silk yarn, put eight stitches onto five different sticks and try (emphasis on try) to knit. We call it:
Tangled trainwreck #1





As overwhelming as it appears, it does (eventually) lead to this:

Circular cast on close up(By God, it does work!)







Which leads us on to our next photo

Center #1
(Isn't she lovely?)





Humph! Apparently not! (too dark)

So I guess we'll call this one
Center #1 - deconstructed




Ah, now here is something I think you'll all appreciate


Melon Seasilk #2 (lighter than her kissing cousin #1)





And...

Tangled trainwreck #2
(That was so much fun the first time, lets do it again!)






And here it is!


A pink shower cap




We'll take a brief rest here, while the artist knits 4 rows, realizes something isn't right in Lilyland, and attempts repairs from two rows up. Now she curses. And rips back 4 rows. This time, she pays extra close attention to the chart. She's got it right now.

She's still 2 stitches short on the next round. She slugs her coffee instead of something more substantial and goes to the computer, thinking there must be something wrong with the chart. She downloads corrections, prints them out, turns to the corrections on that page, and discovers:

YES! There IS a correction of the chart! (she knew it)
NO! It's NOT for the row she's having trouble with (sigh)

Artist leaves house, bound for a meeting with her co-author, shaking her head, but secure in the knowledge that she is an expert knitter who will figure this whole stitch count thing out when she returns.

Upon her return, our intrepid heroine resumes her study. She counts the chart. She counts the stitches. Damn!

Wait! She squints. She puts her face right in the book, directly over said chart.



See? Right there!
A teeny, tiny, minuscule, MOLECULAR LEVEL "y" symbol, which means to knit 1, purl 1 into same stitch, instead of knitting one through back loop as has been the case for the past seven friggin rows.

AHA! It's not that she can't knit. It's that she can't see. (She can live with that.)

Two ripped rows, and four correct rows later, she has something to present as our last picture on the tour.
Shall we resume?



Town center of Lilyland (and all it took was two days)





That concludes our program for today, Ladies and gentlemen. Thank you for coming and don't forget to stick your face into what lies (literally) right under your nose.

Feathers, Fans, & FAT

Notice something?











Let's take a closer look, shall we?









How about now?

Notice the distinct lack of actual blocking being performed by my sock blockers, as evidenced by the wrinkled heel and the loose ribbing at the top? (And folks, these are BIG sock blockers. My family doesn't call me Big Foot for nothing.)

I knew this would happen.

I warned him.

But did he listen?

NO-O-O-O-O!!!

This, my friends, is a sock that has shot right past its optimal weight and has become obese.

Too much beer and TV watching will do that.

Have cast on for Mrs. Monkey on a smaller needle. She should be svelte and sleek.

Then I will put Monkey on a diet. It's a tough job, but somebody has to do it!

Thank you for all the kind comments on Mothy. I'm pretty proud of her. Wore her to yesterday's business lunch with my co-author, and saw envious glances from all the other ladies in the cafe. (Well, they certainly weren't looking at me!)

Nobody took a guess at what Anne's flower was going to be, but I am sure you have all been losing sleep over it. You are just too proud to admit you have no idea what it wants to be when it grows up. Don't worry, I won't keep you in suspense any longer.

This:









leads to this:

seasilk in (l to r) melon, raspberry, and berry. Aren't the colors spot on?






which will become this:

Feather and Fan Shawl from A Gathering of Lace

For the Inspired by Nature KAL

I'm going to radiate the color from the center out, alternating skeins at the color switchovers to blend them into a gradual wash of color. I haven't decided yet whether or not I will try to add the brown of the stamens or the green of the leafy background into it. What do you all think?

Well, that's all for today. If you haven't donated yet to Claudia's Ride, I hear she is only a few hundred dollars short of UPDATE: she has blown past her upgraded goal of $30,000 for MS. Go give now. You'll like yourself in the morning.

It's Over. It's Over. Thank God it's Over (now we must begin again)

As promised:
Ol' Mothy is lookin' pretty chipper after her bedtime soak last night.






By morning, she looked like this.

pattern: Anne Hanson's Wing O' the Moth
yarn: Handmaiden seasilk in Woodland. Two 100g. skeins

I really enjoyed this pattern. Just about the time I would think if I had to do one more pattern repeat I was gonna' hurl, it would be time to move on. The pattern was charted and written out so you could take your pick. I wound up working back and forth between the two, using mainly the chart, but consulting the written directions if I need clarification on anything.

There's a reason this pattern is so popular folks. That Anne: she's a friggin' genius!

Here are a few outdoor shots on the deck, which emphasize the openess of the lace.









A close up of the border.









And the requisite modeled shots.

Ready for takeoff!








The camera adds ten pounds, right? Right? RIGHT?!? ( Wanna go for twenty? I'll go for twenty; hell, why not thirty?)






I don't think I'm ready for America's Next Top Model.
Another dream crushed to bits.
So much for my back up plan. Better hope the book sells...

So what am I working on now? Something quick and easy, down and dirty.

Yep, it's back to the monkey cage for me.

As you can see, I've turned the heel and am getting ready to work the gusset decreases. This sock has some interesting pooling issues, but I'm not worrying about them. I like the cheery color after so many days spent in the woodlands with Mothy (Y'know, I might have to start addressing her by her proper name, now that she is an FO, and a beautiful FO, at that.)

At any rate, Mothy is no longer interested in paying her share of the surveilance fees, so Monkey Investigations is out of business. Poor unemployed sock has nothing to do all day. If I don't show him how important he still is, he might wind up like this:


Yep, that's monkey lyin' around without his instep on, drinkin' beer, and watchin' the Home Shopping Network. Sad, isn't it?





And now, a little mystery for you all. Anne posted this gorgeous shot yesterday as her contribution to eye candy Friday. Can this woman grow flowers, or can this woman grow flowers?!?

So the question is: What do you think this flower wants to be when it grows up? (Anne and Karen can't play, because they already know the answer.)






"What? Monkey isn't using it anymore!"