women of a certain age are like sunflowers; they know how to turn their faces to the sun.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Riddly Riddly Ree...

Vision -- It reaches beyond the thing that is, into the conception of what can be. Imagination gives you the picture. Vision gives you the impulse to make the picture your own.

- Robert Collier

When my sons were small, they were less than fond of eating out. Oh, they liked the food well enough; what they hated was the wait. Brought up on microwaved pancakes & instant pudding, they were unaccustomed to the idea that one might have to delay their gratification till a later point in time.

So we, the adults, became experts at the art of misdirection and subterfuge. We learned all kind of new tricks to keep the lid on the temper tantrums & whining, which loomed just beyond the present moment. One of those tricks was Riddly Riddly Ree.

The game started with one of us proclaiming, "Riddly riddly ree; I see something you don't see and its color is..." The game then passed into the twenty questions phase, "Is it bigger than a bread box?" "Is it here on the table?" "Does it move?"

Once someone correctly guessed what "it" was, that person got to pick out another "it" and off we would go again. This continued till the food arrived or the participants became disinterested, whichever came first.

Vision is on my mind much these days. I have severely dry eyes, have had for the past four years. but it is getting worse. It has become more & more difficult to focus, especially my right eye.

The increasing time spent at my work is undoubtedly the cause. I spend my days either knitting (often in fine yarn) or working at the laptop, charting, writing, communicating, filling orders, looking for yarn, etc...

Yesterday was my annual eye check and I am under orders to: drink more water, use the computer less, & take more frequent breaks while working.

I also have a new prescription and will be getting lachrymal plugs in two weeks. It is hoped that these measures will both alleviate the discomfort & increase my visual acuity back into the normal range.

As with most things in our lives that are working well, we take our eyes for granted. Only when faced with the prospect of their diminished capacity, do we begin to really value what we have. I no longer know what it feels like to have normal vision.

My eyes burn, itch, & go out of focus from the moment I get up until the time I retire for the evening. By 9:00 in the morning, I have a splitting headache. By 9:00 at night, I can no longer see either the television or the computer screen clearly.

I no longer see something you don't see. Now the tables are turned. You see something I don't see. And sometimes the best I can do is guess at what that might be. Riddly, riddly ree...

My outer eyes may struggle, but my interior vision is as acute as ever, thank God. I can still see with my minds eye.

I can look at a yarn and "see" what it wants to be.

I can see my husband's fatigue in the set of his shoulders when he arrives home after a long day at the office.

I can see my friend's heartache, as she speaks of her lost son.

I can also see my mother's world in the movie "Mona Lisa Smile" which was on FX this morning.

Mom went to Connecticut College for Women in exactly the time period and under the same restrictions depicted in the film. If you are not familiar with it, the movie tells the story of a "liberal" female teacher at Wellesley, who confronts tradition and challenges her students to "see" not only art, but life itself, from a new vantage point.

How we see, affects what we see. What we see, affects what we do. And what we do has the power to change not only our environment but the environment of others.

Poor vision needs to be addressed, else we lose our capacity to see clearly. We must protect our sight, whether the solution is new glasses, new attitudes, or a whole new way of looking at the world.


kat said...

I'm sending you BIG HUGS, my friend. I'm also praying these measures help resolve the issues.


Ash said...

What an incredibly relevant post! I'm on my first day of vacation to help me get some perspective on my life. I brought writings from women through the ages. It's so hard to take the time to stop and look but it's very important.

I hope you're feeling better very soon.

weavrmom said...

May you make a full recovery, and your eyes work perfectly again soon. Take care.

Tora said...

beautiful post - bless you and your eyes

Jonica said...

Sending big hugs too. We got word from my mom's eye doctor today that her nerves are bleeding in the eyes and her cataracts are getting worse. So we have to take her to the eye surgeron and see what can be done. She is devestated because she does like to knit also. She only knits the bigger yarns now but she used to do alot of lace and loved it. Now, the tables are turned on her and I am the one doing lace work. I have taken her advice and only knit lace for a small amount of time and do not push it. But, with your evenstar shawl it is hard to put down. Thank you for the wonderful patterns and I hope you have a full and speedy recovery.

Heartsapocolypse said...

I had a similar awakening this last month. I finally got my eyes checked and new glasses after 2 years of increasingly poor vision. I didn't realize how bad it was until I put on the new glasses and could actually see across the room. I nearly wept...
We need to take care of our bodies and be mindful of what needs attention.

Hope these measures bring you some relief and healing...

Donna Lee said...

I hope things even back out for you and the measures you're taking help. I've had dry eyes on and off (reactions to medications) and I sympathize with what you're going through.

So, listen to the doctor, turn off the computer, put on some peaceful music and just be.

Laurie said...

HUGS hugs and positive energy to you. My goodness...I'm so sorry for what you're going through and so impressed with how beautifully philosophical you can be about it. Me? I'd be a raging fool...

I can kind of relate, though. I wore contact lenses for many years. Never had a problem with them till I started using a computer, then I had all kinds of awful issues with eyestrain and dry eyes. People in my office used to laugh at all the bottles of eyedrops sitting around on my desk. LSS, got a bad eye infection, went to the doc, and he recommended I stop wearing contacts and switch to glasses. I did, and my eye problems have been minimal (except for the usual age-related crap...) ever since. I hope your healing is even greater than this.

kaykatrn said...

My eye problems are hereditary. LSS, my Mom finally got wet macular degeneration, just like her Mom, but she had a miracle--went from no vision in one eye to 20/20 vision!! She has been getting injections of a chemo drug in her eye that was only a year old when she was diagnosed!

I hope that the rest and the drops help. and remember to BLINK!!! Even if you do\aren't able to share your thoughts and designs, the beauty of them is still with you.

baby face said...

I'm sorry that you are having so
many problems with your vision.
Try to do some of what the doctor
tells you to do. In my case, I am
getting ready to leave this world,
and I don't listen to my doctor
or I would just vegetate. I still
have goals that I would like to fill although I may not. I have lost my hearing and some of my
vision and glasses will not help
me nor hearing aids. Thank you
for answering my question about
the yarn for the Goldberry scarf.
That is one of my goals along with
at least 100 other things. Take care of yourself and especially
your eyes. They enable you to do
the work that you love. Hugs and